George Lucas is still pissed.

So there's nothing better than updating this site while avoiding my studies. I could be reading up on the 10 chapters I've fallen behind on in my one class oooor. . . updating a blog no one reads. Obviously, I'm going to root for the underdog.

A quick google search brings me exactly what I need. May 28, 1999. I remember this happening and thinking, That's awesome! Turns out the brother of one of the guys was in my creative writing class. But I digress. Here is a small recap of what went down. . .

Menomonie, WI - In May 1999, four men, aided by an employee of the State Theater in Menomonie, WI, stole a print of the "Star Wars" movie "The Phantom Menace" (value: $60,000) in one of the worst-executed crimes in state history. As the men lifted the 3-foot-wide spool from the projector, it unraveled, leaving two miles of celluloid on the floor. The men scooped the mess up, took it home, and tried to wash the film in a bathtub to get rid of their fingerprints (hint: doesn't work). Then, they cut it up for disposal but, after awhile, finally realized they needed to turn themselves in. Authorities said alcohol was heavily involved in the caper. Each was sentenced to five days in jail.

Five days? Five days? That's it? They performed a crime against geekhood and they only got five days?! Oh, oh, here's a snippit of another article:

Menomonie Police Chief Dennis Beety declined to comment on a motive for the theft. Three Menomonie-area men in their 20s were in custody Wednesday pending a review of the case by the Dunn County district attorney. Two men surrendered at the office of their attorney at 9 a.m., while another man showed up at the police department accompanied by his lawyer at 1:45 p.m. "There's no indication that they tried to bootleg it or sell it on the black market or reconfigure it to a different format," Beety said.

Wait. So. . . they had it for four and a half days. They not only managed to ruin the movie (which was probably a blessing) but then they couldn't make their crime actually COOL by selling it overseas? Or, hell, even not turning themselves in and making America wait on the edge of their seats while watching America's Most Wanted would have been pretty awesome. Geez. People from Menomonie need to work on their pilfering skills. We're too damn drunk - or too stupid - to function.